March 5, 2014
He/she who accuses is he/she who does not understand. What is there to forgive? Only ignorance serves arrogance...
It is a wiser and a higher virtue, to help the one who does not understand and release him/her if the obligation or the need of forgiveness.
The one who does not understand is always you! Otherwise, you would not have the need of the belief of ”accusation – forgiveness”, which others and other belief structures want to place in you, as truth.
Nothing is coincidental.
The whole subject is linked to multiple lives, which we think are linear... There is no easy way to get into this major subject, which has been burdened so many lies and misconceptions.
There come moments in your life, when whole “chunks” of memory come up to the surface - provided you have learned how to observe - and you are able to see bigger parts of the puzzle. There is nothing pointless in your life and nothing that happens to “punish” or hurt you. Only opinions and beliefs hurt, at the time we nurture and follow them. These precious moments of our life help us surface pieces of our self that would not otherwise be acknowledged and admitted, thus remaining alienated from our self and disoriented in our lives.
The most difficult times of our lives are meant to help us surface the most hidden and difficult parts of our selves. We are “forced” to go exceptionally deep within ourselves, to realize every well-kept secret, every dark (hidden) aspect of our self. We “complete” the process of gathering the pieces, once we “close the circle”, acquiring the knowledge that eluded us about our own self.
Many think that this means “admittance to a mistake”, realizing the “you were wrong” and like belief statements. Nothing could be further from the truth. Revelation always explains, shows and uplifts you and others, no matter what happened or how you viewed that which happened, in the past. The knowledge that comes from your Self is always eye opening (and “I-opening”) as you discover the specific purpose and the Guided Design of your awakening, through experience. After this revealing Truth, everyone involved is respected, realized and your own path is made clearer.
Forgiveness is a big delusion. The reality of it doesn’t exist. Getting rid of the belief in blame-guilt-punishment is an inside job. It doesn’t concern the other.
Even if you find that you are still accusing within you, that only means that you are still not understanding and therefore inflicting more pain on yourself and those around you.
The other person’s understanding, pieces of the puzzle/lessons etc. are totally different from yours. What’s there to talk about and share?
When people have decided to live together, there should be no secrets… NO secrets! They should be able to talk about everything and anything, having freed themselves from self-accusation and self-rejection. Or, they shouldn’t live together. They should rather meet whenever they wanted to, to create more drama.
When you have realized all this, you can always tell, straight away, when a relationship is not joined “in Spirit”. The secrets or rather the keeping of secrets is so evident on people’s faces that only the liars cannot see. Most relationships are Soul ("Soul" has a separate meaning to "Spirit") and body/instincts/ego relationships, which don't last but provide the ground needed to work out our "stuff" within the self.
The “I’m sorry” part is something different and always concerns the present as well as something mutually and evidently decided:
I’m sorry for breaking the vase.
I’m sorry I didn’t call you.
I’m sorry for being late, etc.
Being sorry, for whatever reason that the incident happened (which does not exclude having to work it out within yourself), is a "surface matter" which we must take responsibility for. Responsibility always goes with accepting the immediate consequences (not "punishment). Consequences are also applied in the present moment, not “the next time”. There is not "next time". Each time is whole new experience... Buy a new vase, accept being deserted on a date, admit being wrong by making a hasty decision etc, etc.
Yet, if the cause is not discovered within, worked out with the Self, the same will be repeated the "next time" and “being sorry” will not mean anything much.
In relationships, the subject is greatly misunderstood. There is only one thing, one aspect that can keep a relationship alive and healthy and that is honesty. But not the kind of “honesty” that people think.
Passion is a product of sincerity. When you have uncovered hidden parts of your self, when you have gone down the lane of honest understanding and revelation, then you are more passionate and “fresh” in what you do. Every time, it’s like being reborn.
In a relationship, these “trips” should be taken with the other AFTER you have surfaced from going deep within your own Self. Then, all communication changes, all aspects of the known transform, as "being together" takes on a new meaning, which is unique and can hardly be described. It is experienced and shared as an example.
Young people begin relationships with the “best of intentions” (more like “hidden ego-intentions and hidden needs and desires) and then end up like everyone else around them. No one can escape the unseen hole in front of them. No one escapes the doom destiny, if the above is not accomplished, because no true preparation was made. The right tools were not given and the relationship begins with ignorance. A sincere relationship with the Self has not been established. When things get tough, there is only emptiness and panicked insecurity to “fall back on”.
This can only be a foreword… the subject is endless, with many sides to it…